Do you Want me to Watch?


Being on vacation with someone who knows you’re Pee Shy is interesting.

Because Mike (my Pee Buddy) knows what I do and why.

He knows why I don’t order another round of drinks.

He knows why I don’t have to go to the bathroom when everyone else does.

He knows why I have to pee right before I head out the door.

He knows

It’s all communicated with a look of the eyes. He gets it.

And he still tries to warn me about “SAFE” bathrooms that I can use, even while on vacation.

“You Can Pee in there!” or “You’d Never be able to use that Bathroom!

He tells me after he goes into a public bathroom. And once he even said it where the people in line in front of us could hear it. AWKWARD! lol

One time he told me “It’s too primitive in there. There are no dividers on the urinals and they are very close together. And the doors on the stall only come up this high” he drags his finger across his chest.


Especially since I needed to pee after 1 1/2 hour drive. It’s not going to happen there.

Yesterday, we’re at a shopping center and the bathrooms are on the top floor. You have to walk up 2 flights of steps to get there (or wait for the elevator).

Both me and Mike go in at the same time. There’s one urinal and one stall. How odd!

So he takes the urinal, and I take the stall. With just us in the bathroom, and only 2 places to pee, I felt safe. I was able to pee pretty quickly. Not to mention the fact that we chatted the entire time. It felt pretty good.

That was a bathroom I could use!

Today, we found another one, it’s at a general store and he goes in the john. I didn’t have a strong urge to go yet, so I didn’t even think about it. But Mike comes out and tells me “That’s a bathroom you can use, because it’s a single user bathroom with a lock on the door“.

So, strong urge or not, I decided to go anyway. I don’t want to pass up on an opportunity to pee easily if I could help it.

I peed with no problems!

On the drive back to the condo, we stopped off for burgers and drinks. After that, I had to pee and by the time we got back and parked, I really had to pee bad.

I get in the condo, our friends were not back yet, and I go in the bathroom and shut the door (I had told Mike days ago that I wouldn’t be doing any desensitization during our vacation).

So I start peeing, and then I hear Mike knocking on the door.


Do you want me to watch?

LMAO I really did laugh out loud. “NO!!!!” I say. I keep peeing.

I know he means to help me out, but it actually came across weird. I laugh. He laughs. That’s the end of that! ha!

I’m not going to put him in that position while we’re in Hawaii. That’s the last thing I want is for our other friends to walk in with both of us in the bathroom at the same time. Yeah! Explain that! haha!

Not going to happen!

They wouldn’t believe me if I told them, which I don’t have any desire to do, so I won’t!

I don’t want them to know I’m pee shy, plus I don’t want to embarrass Mike either. “YOU WATCH HIM PEE?” I can hear it now. NOPE! I just don’t feel comfortable with everyone knowing. I have a hard enough time accepting it myself.

So for now, it’s just Mike who knows about my condition. I trust Mike and know he’ll really try to help me out. He’s cool like that.

But walking in on someone already using the john is awkward. Just a little uncomfortable, right?

If it’s set up that way, properly positioned, and controlled, it’s fine.

But barging in while I’m in the middle of peeing… Sheesh, you’d think I was at a public restroom! ;)

Wouldn’t you say?

This entry was posted in Paruresis Help. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *