What are they Thinking?

Why am I so obsessed about what other people are thinking?

Why does it scare me so badly that they’ll laugh at me, humiliate me, and think less of me as a man?

This type of thinking is so irrational and negative and I know it.

I know that there’s no way that a guy peeing at a urinal is thinking “What a Freak he is. He’s just standing there not peeing!

What Are They Thinking

It’s not going to happen!

The last thing on his mind is ME and what I’M doing in the bathroom! He could care less!

But yet, here I am, paralyzed in fear over the possibility that he saw me. He KNOWS I’m trying to urinate. He knows I can’t PEE! He MUST be thinking I’m a wuss, a wimp, a boy who can’t pee in front of strangers.

Or, he’s thinking I’m a perv and lurking around the men’s bathroom doing God knows what.

My mind is crazy for thinking this. There is no truth or logic to it. No evidence in the least. Nothing that would confirm my misguided suspicions.

In fact, it’s quite the opposite!

Men come into the john focused on one thing and one thing only: To PEE!

Pee quickly and get the hell out! There are better things to do! Like Drink, Watch the Game, Get that Girl’s Phone Number…

No one wants to do this annoying task of nature. We’re forced to do it! It’s time consuming and boring. So most guys are quick about it. They get in, they empty their bladder, they get back to their day.

They don’t worry about it in the least. They’ll pay no attention to anyone else in the bathroom. They don’t look around. They don’t chit-chat. They avoid eye contact. They’ll stare at the wall directly in front of them and void. Pure and simple!

It’s all over in a matter of minutes.

They won’t even know I was in there.

Richard who?

Why does my brain trick me into thinking that they are preoccupied with ME?



They’re thinking about Mowing the Lawn, Who Has to leave the Tip, What they’ll be doing after the Date, how good those Mozzarella Sticks were…

Anything but ME!

They aren’t thinking “Hey Look, this guy is Pee Shy. He’s scared to Piss like a Man! HAHAHAHAH!

So how do you unlearn this belittling behavior? This nightmare that makes Paruretics think it’s all about US?

It’s such selfish kind of thinking.

It’s all about ME and my bladder!

That guy MUST be thinking about me. SO is that guy. And him…


NO ONE is thinking about YOU! No one cares if you can or can’t pee. No one gives a shit if you stand at the urinal for 2 hours! (Unless that’s the only urinal and everyone else is waiting).

They really don’t care!

It’s only YOU and your MIND that creates this fear. None of it is real.

Granted, he may briefly think “Ugh, I have to pee right next to this guy” but that’s all that enters his thoughts. That’s the limit of his perception of me. It’s over as quick as it begun.

He steps up to the urinal, unzips, pees, and leaves. Seconds really! (Especially if they’ve been needing to go for a while)

They’ll go and even forget that I was even there waiting, trying to go.

It will be him going, relieving himself and me waiting patiently. All we’ll hear is the sound of his urination and nothing else. No banter. No laughter. No finger pointing.

30 Seconds later, he’s done, flushed, washing his hands and gone.

You really think he’s still focused on me?


That guy is STILL standing there! What’s he doing?


I don’t buy it.

He’ll leave the bathroom and never look back. He doesn’t even acknowledge that another guys was present. He won’t be watching the bathroom door waiting for me to leave “THAT’S THE GUY!

NOPE! It will NEVER EVER happen!

But in my mind I can hear it tap and whisper in my ear… “What if…


It’s crazy to think that way. I know it!

But the question is: How do you change it?

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