Home Desensitization Days 21 & 22

The last 2 days have felt a little bit different for myself doing at home desensitization with my Pee Buddy Mike.

Every time has been a Success!

I find I’m getting used to having Mike stand behind me as I pee that I hardly even think about it anymore. I find myself thinking about other things, like adding something to my Christmas List, or the fact that Walking Dead’s on TV tonight…

Home Desensitization Days 21 and 22

Even when it takes me longer to begin, I don’t let it get to me much. I just shrug it off and stand there as long as it takes. And sooner or later, I’m peeing!

It’s rather quite refreshing!

Yesterday Mike was gone to the store and I needed to pee. It actually hit me then that it feels odd peeing without Mike there!

I’m getting so used to him being with me, moving around, shuffling, yawning, chatting, bumping me, that it almost doesn’t feel right by myself.

That’s pretty funny!

Who would have thought?

Can I really desensitize myself so peeing around other people seems normal?

I’d say it seems pretty likely.

This morning, I get up at 5:30 (early for me). Mike’s still in his room sleeping. He’s usually an early bird and up before me, so it’s kind of weird.

I grab a coffee and I needed to pee of course. But I don’t! I decided to wait for Mike. I figured he’s be up soon anyway.

Well he doesn’t arise until 6:30, so I had to hold my bladder for an hour.

Mike gets up, I tell him I need to pee. He follows me into the bathroom. Now I’ve had to go for over an hour and we all know what holding it does… it makes it harder to pee.

Sure enough, I probably stood there for 4 minutes before I finally started peeing.

Damn thing!

I will say that it’s much easier to go when I’m not keeping time anymore. Watching a clock tick away just adds stress and makes me feel more anxious.

It’s better just to stand there and take as long as I need.

I know Mike doesn’t care either way. He’s been my best friend for over 17 years. You think an extra minute or two is going to make a difference? Nope! Not on your life.

I still haven’t upped the ante yet. I want to pee under harder conditions, like having Mike stand right next to me as I pee (like we’re at urinals).

That could get tricky!

I know he could easily pee like that…

But could I?

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