Something I’ve been noticing for the past week is rather disturbing to me.
I’m not writing as much!
I used to write every day, and now I’m writing like every other day…
But then again, for the last 3-4 months I had been going through some heavy Desensitization. I’ve leaped huge obstacles and recovery steps that gave me a lot to write about.
But now, not so much!
All I need is to keep practicing and maintaining my forward motion.
My routine for the last couple of weeks has been pretty much the same ole same ole.
In fact, for the last 5 days in particular, I’ve only gone out of the house once. And that was just last night.
We ran up to a local restaurant to grab a quick bite to eat. And then it started snowing like a bitch. We didn’t stay long. The roads got really bad, really fast, and so we ate and dashed. Probably in less than an hour.
While I was there, I did think about going to the bathroom. But I didn’t have to Pee, and I didn’t do any fluid loading because I thought we would be at the restaurant much longer than we were. I figured I’d just drink plenty of liquids there… But nope, that’s not how it all worked out.
Mother Nature had Different Plans!
So the evening was cut short and the blizzard had a party.
So much for Desensitization 101!
We also did have plans for Saturday. But that got squished when friends of ours cancelled. No practice there!
The beginning of last week was great. I peed in many, many bathrooms. But the last few days have brought me nothing.
No Peeing in Public!
What can one do? Errands and the weeks activities will always be up and down. I know that. Things happen.
Like today is Movie Day, so that should be fun! :)
And then Thursday is another adventure. We are planning an all day event. An hour long drive to a huge Mall up North, and then Dinner Reservations at an expensive Steak House. I can’t wait. It should bring me plenty of places to pee… Even though it may be interesting since Kay is going with us and she doesn’t know I’m Pee Shy, nor will she understand why I brought 14 bottles of water (seems like that many) and downing them the whole day just so I can pee pee pee. HA! Explain that!
So I may not write as much now, I have a habit of rambling anyway, and sometimes I have nothing new to say. But this is my blog and my posts and my recovery… and that’s all that really matters to me! :)
February is quickly coming to an end…
I can’t wait for Winter to leave! And then Spring is looming on the horizon. Once that gets here I’ll be outside more, in public… and looking forward to peeing in nature (something I haven’t really done yet). :)
Road Trips, Photography, Nature Trails, Amusement Parks… The world is my bathroom! Right?
So do I have anything to worry about?
Will writing less affect my recovery?
Should I be concerned in the least? Only write when something major happens? I hope it doesn’t bring me out of touch with my Paruresis. Make me think less about it! Send my Shyness back into the far corners of my mind, into the deepest, darkest shadows…
Only time will tell.
And then I’m sure, oh no, I’m positive I’ll write about that! :)