It’s Day 36 and I’m working on Breath Hold (BH) more and more.
I hold my breath as long as I can while attempting to pee, and then I hold it some more.
I know those last couple of seconds are crucial to getting results and mastering the Breath Hold Technique. So I’m pushing it as far as I can.
I’ve also been varying my BH and trying different things throughout the day:
- Letting out all the air in my lungs
- Letting out all the air, and then still blowing some more out
- Exhaling small short breaths every couple of seconds
- Taking a very deep breath and holding it
You Name it!
I’m Testing it!
I have peed while holding my breath several times today. But, like most of these successful times, I was alone so there was no great pressure or fear of peeing.
But I did make one huge breath through and advancement today…
I looked my Pee Buddy in the eye!
That’s right. I finally upped the ante…
Tonight, after supper, I went to the bathroom to pee with my Pee Buddy Mike. But this time, as he came into the bathroom to take his normal position behind me, I stopped him. I told him to stand at the toilet next to me and pretend like he was peeing (like we’re at urinals).
But, since the toilet is oval, we ended up not standing side by side as you would expect, instead, he was on the side of the toilet and I was in front, so he was at a 90° angle to me. His shoulder was almost up against mine and his face was facing towards the toilet and me.
And even though he was facing forward, I could see his eyes moving around. In fact, many times I’d glance over and see him staring at me. Which made me stare back even more. This is Crazy!
I could read it in his eyes “Are you going to Pee?“
This is the first time that I’ve ever tried peeing while looking someone in the eyes. It’s very unnerving.
And Guess What?
I Peed!
I’m still floored by it. But I was actually able to pee with Mike inches away and looking at me. That’s crazy. Maybe all this desensitization has just made me so comfortable peeing around Mike that it’s not useful anymore? Who knows? Could I actually pee doing this with a total stranger? Probably not!
I will also state that the lights were off in the bathroom, so it was fairly dark in there, except for a small nightlight.
Who knows how daylight and a bright bathroom will change things?
Will I still be able to go?
That’s what a Month of Pee Buddy Practice has brought me… Face to face with my fears!
So Good Job! Congrats on standing tall!
Now I need to keep this up and desensitize in public restrooms.
That’s the real test!
This Week’s Goals
My Goal again this week is 3 Public Bathrooms and 3 Urinals! I don’t have to actually use them to pee, but I just need to get comfortable being there.
Step by step!
It’s not easy, but I’ll get there! :)
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