Urinal Humor

I saw a funny bathroom post on iFunny yesterday…

It’s an image of the different types of guys you see at the urinals.

Of course, it caught my eye!

Take a look…

Urinal Humor!

Now those are clever, brought a chuckle, and oh so true… But there’s clearly one type of urinal guy that’s left out:

The Paruretic!

You know who they are. They are frozen at the urinals for a long time while other guys come and go.

They stand there unable to urinate. They need to pee badly, but they can’t! They are locked up and their bladder refuses to let the urine flow.

The Pee Shy Guys!

Guys with Shy Bladder are at the urinals all the time, but the funny thing is, you just don’t know it.

You never see them! They blend in and disappear!

You could be standing directly next to a guy who can’t pee, and they all look and act the same. They flush, wash and leave…

Who would know?

Paruretics hide themselves pretty well. They live off Shame, Embarrassment, and Secrecy!

They wait until the bathroom is empty before they make their attempt to pee.

If some guy comes in, they quickly flush and bolt. Even if it means leaving with a full bladder.

They do this because they (we) don’t want you to know that we have a Bashful Bladder. We don’t want to seem less masculine, less than other guys.

And so, we leave with our tail between our legs and head for home, where we can pee in a “safe” toilet.

This is the life we live!

We are terrified of Public Bathrooms, Urinals, Crowds, Noises, and the biggie: Not being able to Pee!

That’s really the bottom line.

We think we’ll fail, and that’s exactly what happens.


So Paruretics are out there, you just don’t know it. They are just like every other guy coming and going in the john…

Except for one simple difference:

Normal Guys Pee – Paruretic’s Don’t!

Maybe one day, through Gradual Exposure Therapy, Pee Buddies, Desensitization and Fluid Loading, you TOO could be one of those guys standing at the urinal. The one with their feet spread wide apart (the over spreader)… Or the guy that farts (the multitasker), starts talking (the noisy), or pees while playing Angry Birds (the busy)… Who knows?

You could get there!

I’m closer than I ever have been in my life. I can taste victory! I practice everyday, all day, every week… It’s a new life, a change of course. I’m heading in the right direction!

But even as a Paruretic I still can’t tell who’s Pee Shy in the john or not.

And if I can’t notice… Do you think that regular guys will?

I think not! :)

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