I’m all over the board with my trials and tribulations. Some things go well, others, down the drain!
Like peeing with my Pee Buddy Today, IT WASN’T A FLUKE!
I WAS able to pee side by side with Mike at the toilet with me.
He didn’t pee, but pretended he was (which at times were hilarious!)
But all times I peed! And I peed in broad daylight. It didn’t change matters. All worked well!
But what took a Nose Dive?
For day 37 in my home desensitization, you’d think that I’d start to get a handle on this. But actually, I didn’t do one Breath Hold all day!
I was too concerned with peeing next to my Pee Buddy to think of anything else. Preoccupied!
Pee Buddy = 1 Breath Hold = 0
And what about my Public Bathroom Goal? (You know, to visit 3 Public Bathrooms and stand at 3 Urinals for 3 minutes)
Well, I missed a lot of opportunities today!
Yesterday I didn’t go out anywhere, but today, I was all over town. I could have used plenty of Public Restrooms like: Office Max, Big Lots, Krogers, Walgreens, and the Restaurant I ate at. But that gets a big fat ZERO as well!
Paruresis really is Hit and Miss!
I didn’t step foot into any one of those bathrooms. I thought about it. Mike even brought it up when he used one and asked me if I needed to go…
What did I say?
I need to work on that. It’s so difficult for me to force myself. It’s so uncomfortable! But I must do it! I have to!
Where’s my Courage now?